Feb 15, 2024
The Life of Death
Loving her might be a sin, but I’m in hell anyway.
___
I have been Death for about 940 years now. They say I became Death because of some pretty bad things I did when I was human. Maybe? I don't remember. Perhaps being Death isn’t so bad after all—at least, that's what I keep telling myself.
I decide who deserves to live, who goes to heaven, and who reincarnates. Fiddling with the paper in my hand, I look across the table. “I swear I deserve to go to heaven!” he screams, or rather, his soul does. “Your record suggests otherwise,” I reply as the color drains from his face. “You let your child starve?” I ask, raising an eyebrow. “It was for her own good! It was to make her fit...” he stammers on.
''Man, you’re not making any sense. Please, drink this and proceed through that door,” I say, pouring the ‘tea’ and pointing towards the exit. “What is this?” he inquires. “This drink will erase your memories of this life. Now drink it and go,” I grumble.
As the man shuffles out, I sigh. This job, this endless cycle of judgment, is exhausting.
That's when she walks in, a being so full of light and joy it’s almost blinding. Vivara, the Goddess of Life, my exact opposite in every conceivable way.
“I believe I told you to stop visiting me?” I question, looking at her. She takes a seat across from me, right where the man earlier was sitting, and replies, “Hmm? Did you? I don’t remember.” She pretends to ponder.
"What do you want, Vivara?" I grumble, annoyed by her perpetual happiness.
"I thought you might need some company," she says, settling down across from me. "And perhaps a break from all this gloom."
I scoff at her words. Company? From her?
"You know nothing of my duties," I retort sharply.
"But I do know about loneliness," she replies softly, her gaze holding mine.
Something in her words catches me off guard, and despite myself, I find us engaging in actual conversation.
Days turn into weeks, and she keeps coming back. We talk about everything and nothing. She tells me about the joys of creating life, and I share the burdens of ending it.
One day, she looks at me with those bright eyes and says, "You know, you're not as grim as you pretend to be."
"Careful, Vivara," I warn her. "Falling for Death can only end in tragedy."
But she just laughs, her laughter like music to my ears. "Who says I'm falling? Maybe I'm just stepping deliberately."
It’s foolish, I know. The Goddess of Life and the embodiment of Death? It's a disaster waiting to happen.
Then, one evening, my worst fears come true. The higher gods call us into council, having learned of our relationship. She was already there, crying. It tore my heart to pieces. I wanted to rage against everyone there for her sake.
The higher god spoke, “I suppose you know why you are here?”
“Certainly,” I say, without hesitation.
“Since you’re aware it's against the rules for deities from heaven and hell to form relationships, you also understand you’re about to be punished?”
“Yes.”
“But it’s not you who will be punished. It’s her. We have decided to grant her mortality.”
“There's no way in hell you’re doing anything to her! It should be me!!” My throat goes dry.
“You’ve been punished since you became Death. And your greatest punishment will be when, years later, you find her soul sitting across from you, waiting to be reincarnated.” Tears rush down my cheeks as I embrace her fragile body.
___
It's my 1000th year now. I've been a mess ever since I lost her.
“Hello, Death,” the woman in front of me says.
She looks old, yet she’s the most beautiful soul I’ve seen. “I hope you had a good life?” I try to maintain my composure.
“It was hard without you, but I managed,” she smiles. Her smile could bloom flowers, light up any dark room. And that’s when I break down. I sob until there are no tears left. She stands and embraces me, just like I did for her years before.
And this time, not one but two people drink the memory-erasing tea. I extend my hand towards her, and she holds it gently, so gently that I'm almost afraid I'll break her if I hold it too firmly. And together, we step through that door into another life.
Saniya Jha
Saniya Jha, thrives on “do first, think later” philosophy. In her leisure moments, she engages in watching movies and reading. She is also a violinist in training. She believes that a cup of coffee can fix everything!
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