Smokie – The Beleaguered Raven

What did you say? Go to the city? No way! That place isn’t for me. Nah! Not at all! I’m happy living here, in the stillness of the green forest. The last time I visited the city I was nearly pecked to death by a bunch of stupid sparrows. What did you say? You want to know how it happened. Very well, let me begin from the beginning. I’m Smokie, the raven, dark as the darkest night.

It so happened that a group of youngsters came to this very forest and camped at this very spot. They were a set of lively human beings. They loved to sit around and while away their time with some device in their hands. Now what did they call it? Ahh... let me see... yes... mobile phones! They used it to click pictures, shoot videos, search for solutions to their problems they faced in the forest and even to listen to songs. I remember one of those songs... hmm... what were the words? Oh yes!

‘Sally called when she got the word.

And she said, “I suppose you’ve heard... about Alice?”

When I rushed... Hmm.... Hmmm...’

This was... is... my favourite song. Well, there was this girl in their group with dark black hair just like my feathers, and her eyes were dark too. Her favourite colour was black. Oh... how could I have not fallen in love with her? She was the perfect match for me.

I watched her every day from my perch on the tree beside the river. She laughed like an angel... Ahh... What a beautiful sight! She walked like a gazelle, so gracefully, and sang like a nightingale. Did I tell you her name? No? Well, her name was... I mean is Alice. Soon I began sighing like a steam engine and all my raven friends teased me.

Charlie, my brother sidled closer to me one day and cawed, “Why don’t you propose to her, bro?”

I looked at him thoughtfully and said, “That’s a great idea! I must start brushing up my flight manoeuvres, hunting and dancing skills. Let me begin from this very minute”. I immediately took flight to a lonely spot and practised for hours on end. I swooped and tumbled and soared. I squawked and cawed and crowed and cooed. I hopped and tumbled and somersaulted and dived. I perfected each move and each note. When I was satisfied I returned. But alas! The group had gone. My dearest Alice had gone. I was heartbroken!

My buddy, my childhood friend, Blackie greeted me with a piece of good news. He told me he had heard them leave in their minibus and had followed them with Charlie. I did a little jig and kissed them both.

“Charlie and Blackie, both of you will be my best men. Let’s fly to my love immediately,” I said.

“Away, away to thy love let’s fly. You, Charlie, me and I,” sang Blackie joyously.

So, we three musketeers, I mean ravens spread our wings, wings as dark as the darkest night and took flight.

We flew and flew and flew for miles and finally reached Alice’s home. I was so overjoyed I couldn’t stand still for even a moment. I flapped my wings and danced. I decided that I was going to greet my beloved with a gift and a song.

“You can try checking the garbage dumps,” suggested Charlie. “I’ve heard that our cousins, the crows, get their grub from there. They boast that it overflows with variety.”

“Oh hush!” I silenced him. “I’ll have nothing but the best for my love. Look it’s almost getting night. Rats and other rodents will be on the prowl for food. One of them will be the perfect proposal gift for my angel.” I rubbed my hands (read wings) with glee as I imagined her smiling at me.

So as planned, I took up my post on the banyan tree beside Alice’s house and waited for darkness to fall. Right enough, rats and mice soon emerged from various nooks and corners to gather food for the banquet. It seemed they were having a party that night. Some were big, some small, some black, some brown, some lean and some were all round. I watched them keenly, made my choice, swooped down and the rat was in my beak. The other mice got a start; they squeaked and ran helter-skelter, their party all forgotten.

Charlie and Blackie thumped my back and praised my hunting skills as I alighted softly on the tree’s branch. They wanted me to go and propose to the dainty maiden but I forestalled their suggestions. I knew better than to disturb my beloved’s beauty sleep. I decided to make my proposal over breakfast.

As the sun painted the sky with brilliant pinks and reds, I woke up, stretched, squawked and hopped out to the branch end. I saw my lovely Alice on the balcony clicking ‘selfies’ with her mobile phone. No less than Aurora herself, Alice glowed in the morning light. I decided that it was the best time to serenade her. So I flew on to the gatepost, cleared my throat and began singing:

‘Sally called when she got the word.

And she said, “I suppose you’ve heard... about Alice?”

When I rushed to the window and looked outside...’

B-a-m! Wh-a-m!

“Smokie!” cawed Blackie and Charlie in alarm. “Are you alright?”

“Acchooo! Acchooo!” I sneezed as I stood up from where I fell and dusted myself. “Yes! Yes! I’m absolutely fine. She’s a tough one - my Alice! But I’ll surely win her heart.”

“Ahem... Are you sure you’re fine? That was quite an aim and she didn’t sound too happy with your singing,” Charlie looked doubtful. “She tried to shoo you away before she threw that bottle but you didn’t hear. You were engrossed in singing.”

“Ohh... nothing to worry! I’ve heard it’s difficult to please women. My gift will win her heart. Let me get going. Looks like it’s time for her breakfast,” I said cheerfully.

“Hey buddy! Listen! The sparrows around are increasing in number. They aren’t very glad to see us. Can you hear them twittering angrily?” Blackie looked around furtively. “Shouldn’t we fly back to our forest?”

“Come on, Blackie! Don’t be a spoil sport and such a coward. I’m sure she’ll accept my proposal this time. Wish me luck!” I collected my gift and flew in through the open window. I placed my present on the plate just in front of my lady love as she sat checking that mobile phone again. Then I cooed softly to her.

“Yikkess! A dead rat!” she screamed. “Get out, you silly bird! Shooo...”

I decided to show her my moves now that I had her attention. So I swooped and dipped, twirled and soared around the dining room. My darling kept trying to imitate me by flapping her arms. She called loudly and a small boy came into the room with a big stick and tried to hit me. I dodged him and got closer to my Alice. She screamed and threw the first thing that came in her hands - it was a long black cord. I know these humans call it a USB cable. I was terrified when more of her family joined her. They all shouted and screamed. I hurried out of the window with the wire around my neck. I sat on the boundary wall of her house panting from my exertions and tried to get rid of that wire I was entangled in.

Suddenly a bunch of sparrows attacked me. They knocked me off the wall and pecked me.

“Help! Help!” I screamed.

“Who are you? And why are you in our territory?” screeched the sparrows.

“I’m Smokie. I’m a raven from the nearby forest,” I shouted to be heard above the din. “I came to propose to the one I love.”

“Liar!” they said vehemently pecking me harder. “You’re the evil one! You killed Squeaky, the rat, and you plan to kill us all one by one. You have this evil looking serpent wrapped around you as mentioned in our books of mythology. You are the Destroyer, black as the darkest night and surrounded by his pet reptile. We have to kill you if we want to live!”

“What? No, I’m Smokie, the lovesick raven! I swear! Let me go! Blackie! Charlie! Help!” I screamed.

Friends, I can’t tell you how difficult it was to escape. I was half dead by the time I managed to get rid of that clingy wire and those silly sparrows. I owe my life to my buddy and my bro. They saved my life that day. We finally raced back to our forest and I have never left it thence. I often think of my Alice and sing a few words from that song:

“Twenty-four years waiting for a chance

To tell her how I feel, and maybe get a second chance

Now I’ve got to get used to not living next door to Alice...”